::embodiment - a dangerous need::

The Incredulity of Saint Thomas by Caravaggio

"Then he [Jesus] said to Thomas, "Put your finger here, and see my hands; and put out your hand, and place it in my side. Do not disbelieve but believe."" John 20:27

One of my friends and I's favorite things to do is to ask 'would you rather' questions. So, would you rather... be a brain on a stick or a warm body in a room? In our world today, we would probably choose the warm body because we value the mental more than the physical. This can spiral off into the societal problems about how we view the business vs the working class, white vs blue collar jobs, etc. But for now, it's fascinating and perhaps mildly horrifying to understand how our society views and values different careers and abilities.

I'm a recent college grad who has a desk job. I stand in solidarity with many people, including Christians, who struggle with embodiment and the physicality of my self, my faith, and living on this earth. Like some of you, I sit and look at a computer for most of the day. It's about my mental capacities, ability to problem-solve, communicate, and administrate all without leaving my chair. I can easily work remotely if something like, oh say, a pandemic were to hit. This is in contrast to my previous job as a daycare teacher which was heavily embodied. That was about being on the ground with the kids, snuggling them, playing with them, cleaning up after them. Some of the embodied parts I loved and I miss very much like giving them hugs, making goofy faces, and doing crafts. Running around after them for 9 hours a day and constantly cleaning up was more exhausting. You don't want to be a brain on a stick but neither do you just want to be a body in a room. I've done both ends and not yet found a middle. If you know of something, please tell me!

As coronavirus cases are surging in the States and the world, the vitality of embodiment comes to the forefront again as I wonder how much longer we'll be able to be physically present with one another. In so many ways, we are still floating heads on the screen. We are voices in ears. We are texts on phones. But we aren't there. Our bodies are a danger to each other. I've seen people cross the sidewalk when they are walking towards me. One woman walks in the street and the other on the sidewalk in order to maintain 6ft. You feel obligated to explain every sniffle or cough. Friends stay home if there's even a hint of contact or exposure. We may feel less embodied in this time yet we are more aware of our physical bodies than ever before. Our breath, our touch, our standing there always mattered because God formed us but now we are finding new significance in those things. What we need most in this valley of shadow and death is to be together in embodied ways and that's exactly what we are not able to do. 

So what does it mean to be embodied? It's part of holistic living which means that matter matters. Our bodies matter. Spaces and places matter. The things in our lives, what we have or the lack thereof, matter. We acknowledge all this subconsciously but it's rising to the surface in this season. We are far more aware of our houses and who enters into them. We know the streets of our neighborhood as we walk them day after day. We are conscious of each other's bodies particularly those who are older or are immuno-suppressed. We are frustrated with what cannot be done or said in person and that no technology can recreate for us. As we stay home, we are intimately aware of what we have lost and we struggle to know how to grieve those losses. I miss being able to take Eucharist with my church family. I miss gathering in my small group leader's home. I miss having friends over for dinner. There are creative ways we are staying connected and ministering to one another but we know it's not the same. We are not meant to live such disembodied lives. Embodiment is what grounds us to the earth, to one another, to what it means to be human. 

Which is why it is one of the biggest mysteries and intimacies of Christ. He was fully human which means he was embodied. He was clothed in flesh and hair just as we are. He felt all the things we do in our bodies such as tears dripping down his cheeks, tired legs after walking, a hungry stomach, coughing and sneezing, and everything else. Jesus knows what it means to be so and therefore He also knows what it's like as we struggle feeling disembodied, unable, and weary. Thomas putting his hand into Jesus' side makes us viscerally react because we know that Jesus is embodied and those are real wounds. Yet, Christ invites him to do so, saying, "believe. Believe in my embodiment of God and man. Believe that I am the resurrection and the life. Believe that there is hope." Jesus practiced embodiment and I believe that you should too because by practicing embodiment, you are practicing hope.